Would you like an easy way to feel great? Here’s how…

There is a phrase people used to use this time of the year along the lines of ‘goodwill to all men’.  I haven’t heard it for a while, have you? Not even paraphrased to ‘…all men and women’ or even ‘… to all humankind’.

Those of you who have been reading my blogs for a while will have noticed that I’m always encouraging you to give random acts of kindness.

I just remembered reading an interview with Mother Theresa where the journalist was shocked at the squalor of her environment and praised her selflessness.  In reply, she exclaimed, “You don’t understand!  I’m happy!”

Read moreWould you like an easy way to feel great? Here’s how…

As if being unhappy weren’t enough, there’s more, isn’t there…

One of the reasons I stayed so long in my first marriage, was that I didn’t let myself to see the depth of my unhappiness.

It’s what’s called being in denial.

When I looked back with the benefit of hindsight, I saw that there were five areas which affected my unhappiness.

Read moreAs if being unhappy weren’t enough, there’s more, isn’t there…

You’re only one decision away from a totally different life – and here’s how…

At my Meetup earlier this week, we had a new member joining us.  She told us she only found out about my meeting 2 hours ago and decided to come.

So here’s the thing.

She could have decided that 2 hours was too short and that she’d better wait until next month’s Meetup.

Had she decided not to come, nothing would have changed for her.

Read moreYou’re only one decision away from a totally different life – and here’s how…

How to let go of your pain

The experience of pain is a very personal one. What causes one person pain, another can handle with a shrug.

Some of the causes are significant and obvious – an affair, lies, betrayal and more.

And then there’s the kind of cause that is subtle, the kind that makes you go for a very long time wondering why you’re feeling hurt, upset, frustrated or resentful – and the drip-drip-drip effect continues until one day you wake up depleted, empty, with your self-confidence shattered and a strong feeling of unworthiness.

As with physical pain where the body twists itself in unlikely shapes in order to cope with it, we do the same with emotional pain. We try to adapt to minimise the pain so we can pretend it doesn’t really hurt – as I did for so many years.

Read moreHow to let go of your pain

Are you the kind of person who…?

Are you the kind of person who has a dream?

That’s wonderful! You’d be amazed how many people don’t know what they want. They DO know what they DON’T want, but they DON’T know what they DO want.

Maybe you’re the kind of person who dreams and hopes with all their heart that they will come true and then, when they don’t, you’re disappointed.

Or it might be that what’s missing is that you don’t know your Big Why?

Read moreAre you the kind of person who…?

What if the low points of your life turned out to be the best?

As I was growing up, my parents did everything they could to ensure I suffered as few disappointments and made as few mistakes as possible. My Dad especially tended to urge me to follow his advice at all times on the grounds of his greater life experience.

When I resisted and did ‘it’ my way I, more often than not, fell flat on my face. He was then quick to point out, “See? I told you so!”

Not surprisingly, this affected any trust in my own judgement I might have had.

Read moreWhat if the low points of your life turned out to be the best?

And the answer to what creates emotional closeness is…

One of the things I continue to notice in my relationship with Paul is the importance of small gestures, the kind that, at first sight appear to be trivial but that, cumulatively, check all the important boxes. These are the gestures that, though small, have an impact which is out of all proportion to the effort it takes to make them.

Read moreAnd the answer to what creates emotional closeness is…